Wisdom: Update On April 26th, 2010

We leave Bermuda in 2 hours and sail to Antigua. I love sailing, it always provides time alone and time to rest. Not that I need much rest after Bermuda, since it was ridiculously slow, but I always appreciate rest. During the sail I will work in two different departments, the galley and as an Angel. Angels clean the whole ship, so we’ll see how I do waking up at 6 a.m. and all. Bermuda was nice; I took the last break of my time on the ship, which was a whole lot of nothing, honestly. I got to be with friends, which is always a blessing. The rest of Bermuda was nice, and the people are pretty nice. There is a strong Christian fellowship here, and the guys involved are amazing guys. I spent a few hours with some guys who go to prison nearly every day because a pipe was broke and we couldn’t meet with the prisoners. There is something about older Christian guys that makes me enjoy being around them, something about the wisdom that comes with mistakes, and the joy that comes through pain and perseverance that makes me want to learn from them. I think with guys like these the biggest thing that these guys possess, often, is true humility. I heard a quote once that was something like “The humble man only hears he is humble, but never believes it”. Humility is a life-long struggle for mankind, one that is a dangerous path, due to false humility tearing apart our true hearts and rooting all we do in pride. I am realizing how prideful I truly am with every new day that offers it’s challenges. I am in deep with pride, and am struggling to rid myself of it, which, I think, is what Christ talked about when he said “…and anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me”. Pride is a root of evil, maybe the root of evil even.

A Beast: Update on April 17th, 2009

I sit looking over a sea as blue as the sky, which trees rustling with the wind, and big houses decorating the uneven land. Currently, I am on my last break of the time spent with the ship in Bermuda. It is beautiful here, there is little doubt about that. The city of Hamilton, where the Ship is staying, is a monument to the god of wealth. The buildings are a nice site to behold, but it certainly feels like something is missing. The people are friendly and will talk to you and help you, but it feels superficial. This is Bermuda; this is the world in a nutshell; this is the trap of discontentment.
As I said, the place is beautiful, and I am more than blessed to be able to take a break here, but there is something not quite right. Not in the buildings, not in the people even, but in the culture. The people here have anything they can desire, yet it is never enough. It is not just here, but everywhere. We are all victims of the consumer age, yet we all play along so often. I cath myself thinking about the next thing to occupy my time; the next new pleasure. I find myself wanting more and more, never feeling completey satisfied with the new thing. My heart has been weighed, and been found wanting.
So here I sit, looking upon a glory man could never surpass with her will and power, wondering why I want more. Here I sit amongst people who love and care about me on a trip I could never have provided for myself, thinking about the next thing to keep mme happy. Here I sit hating the beast living inside of me, yet not knowing how to kill it. The beast lives everywhere, attacking our impulses and insecurities to drives us into want. The beast breahthes it's flames, searing the contentment we can experience with our Saviour. The beast must be slayed. Jesus is all I need, there are no if's, and's, or but's to that, and I pray He makes that all the more obvious as I grow older and see more.

A Beast: Update on April 17th, 2009

I sit looking over a sea as blue as the sky, which trees rustling with the wind, and big houses decorating the uneven land. Currently, I am on my last break of the time spent with the ship in Bermuda. It is beautiful here, there is little doubt about that. The city of Hamilton, where the Ship is staying, is a monument to the god of wealth. The buildings are a nice site to behold, but it certainly feels like something is missing. The people are friendly and will talk to you and help you, but it feels superficial. This is Bermuda; this is the world in a nutshell; this is the trap of discontentment.
As I said, the place is beautiful, and I am more than blessed to be able to take a break here, but there is something not quite right. Not in the buildings, not in the people even, but in the culture. The people here have anything they can desire, yet it is never enough. It is not just here, but everywhere. We are all victims of the consumer age, yet we all play along so often. I cath myself thinking about the next thing to occupy my time; the next new pleasure. I find myself wanting more and more, never feeling completey satisfied with the new thing. My heart has been weighed, and been found wanting.
So here I sit, looking upon a glory man could never surpass with her will and power, wondering why I want more. Here I sit amongst people who love and care about me on a trip I could never have provided for myself, thinking about the next thing to keep mme happy. Here I sit hating the beast living inside of me, yet not knowing how to kill it. The beast lives everywhere, attacking our impulses and insecurities to drives us into want. The beast breahthes it's flames, searing the contentment we can experience with our Saviour. The beast must be slayed. Jesus is all I need, there are no if's, and's, or but's to that, and I pray He makes that all the more obvious as I grow older and see more.

Pain and A Challenge: Update on April 6, 2010

The Bahamas is full of tourism; in fact, ther is no national export, they only provide entertainment for people with the money to come. There is wealth galore within the first roads, starting at the beach, and there are people throwing around money. One can stay in a local hotel called the Atlantis (where Oprah stays) for up to $30,000 a night, and many people stay here. The ferry to an island across the sound is around $25 and thousands of people make the trip. Somebody is selling something at any time of the day, from conch shells to marijuana, you can find anything here. It is much like the US in that regard and in many other regards, such as their sports. I had the chance to go and play football with a local group of guys the past two Saturdays, and it has been a blast. I reminded me of being home on a perfect summer night.

Another thing that makes me think of home is on a quite different level. There are hundereds of kids in this town alone that are left on their own, by either irresponsible parenting or state mandates, much like home. In a small town maybe the size of Port Huron, there are a huge number of orphanages, abandoned kid's homes, and other child serivce providers. They are trying to help these kids, which is a good start.

The fact is that the main thing these kids want is attention and to be accepted by someone, anyone. I had the opportunity to go and present Christ to these kids, while trying to show them the love that he would have given them. I went to a hostile today where kids of any age come when social services so decides, and the kids were awesome. We did a program that presented the gospel clearer than we would be able to in America, and I can only pray that I loved them the way Jesus would have. I went to a place where kids are brought by parents who don't want them any more, and it nearly brings tears to my eyes trying to imagine the pain of that. We also did a short program and played with them as well. They really just want someone to listen, to touch, to hold them, and to know that they have worth. The teachers at the institution were all seemingly unhappy with their job which translates into them not treating the kids with love. This world is so messed up that these precious kids grow up thinking that they won't be loved. The fact is that sexs' allure will draw many who aren't ready for parenthood, which in turn means many kids will feel unloved, even at home.

So my challenge is this: show someone that life is beautiful. Step up (much like I need to do) to helping a kid on his way into a relationship with the One who will love him unconditionally, while you go out and love them too. these kids are precious to the Father, so shall we belittle their worth by being too busy to go out and care for them? I hope not, and I pray that even after the ship I can continue loving the kid's who feel meaningless.

The Hand Painting the Picture: Update on March 27th, 2010

Sometimes my eyes are opened to what surrounds me
Sometimes I realize a dense presence overtaking
Not a lonely, dark presence but a mysterious peace
Sometimes, rarely, can I even respond to the painting
She convicts me of my apathy towards what I see
She charges me guilty of not loving my neighbor
And of believing that things far too complex to know
Are nothing but simple figures and numbers
But as the chilling air tingles down through my spine
Reaching the inmost parts of my darkened soul
It’s times like these that one feels more than sees
And at such a rare time one can see more than canvas
One can sense that what’s before him is more than a fixture
In times like these one sees the hand painting the picture.

That poem sums up the past four days of my life. We are now in the Bahamas, and it is something totally different than Jamaica. The place we are berthed is a harbor which can hold up to 14 different cruise ships, and is the port of registry of the largest cruise ship in the world, The Oasis of the Seas (I think). We saw that ship yesterday, and it was pretty ridiculous; the money we throw around for leisure is insane! Anyways this is a welcome change of pace, since we had over 130,000 people on board last port, including two days of over 7,000 people, and sold some 80,000 popcorns, and 50,000 ice creams, it was super busy. This port will be slow, and give time to think and rest a bit, while also presenting an opportunity to the emboldened ones of us to try and talk with whoever comes. Many people that come may be from the USA due to the time of year (spring break). I hope to be emboldened and to share my faith fearlessly.

Before the arrival, we sailed. For three days after leaving Jamaica, which was absolutely amazing. I made sure to take time to talk with God, which is always a rewarding choice. I spent much of those three days alone, and a good amount of time in prayer. I saw God’s hand on the vastness of the sea, which teems with life. This brought thoughts of humanity in my head, and how blessed we are to be created in his image, and how complicated the human body is. Things around us often seems simple, say a plant taking in sunlight for growth or walking, when in actuality they are immensely complex. I still don’t quite understand why the earth feels flat or how plants use sunlight to grow with water, or how a baby is formed in a womb. We know the science behind it, but it is hard to think of such enigmas as random. Anyways, the last night of sailing was our prayer night, which was a good one where we spent time worshiping as the sun went down. It is still crazy how 400 people from every background imaginable coerce to create a community of peace. It is only because we all fly His banner that this can happen, and I thank God I get to be a part of it, even if it is a mere breath.

The end of Jamaica was absolutely crazy. There were school kids piled upon school kids, and all of them ordered popcorn. We had 7,100 people on our last Saturday and 7,200 on the last Sunday. Those were Logos Hope records, and everyone wanted popcorn. My job was a bit hectic and frustrating, but the Lord guided me through well. I even had a chance to go back to the Trenchtown reading center I had mentioned in a prior post and see a lot of those kids again. Although it was more of the same, it still felt new. The kids remembered me, and I played with them and had a blast doing it. I only hoped they felt loved.